Thought Bubble: Social Media Backlash of Beauty

“Beauty is only skin deep”- Sir Thomas Overbury (1613 )

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder- Margaret Wolfe Hungerford (1878)

There has been a lot of noise on social media based on what it means to call yourself a social media influencer, calling into question what people are choosing to represent. One activist said that people are portraying a picture of unachievable beauty,  creating a materialistic atmosphere showing followers that it only matters if you have numbers behind you but isn’t that what this world is all about? Isn’t this a message that has always been portrayed through centuries?

A disclosure, I write the majority of articles as a thinking person that doesn’t have all the answers. I do not write them to solve mankind’s issues or even to give a solution but if we want to get deep and take it all the way back as if it was a Thursday, mankind only raises their head and pays attention if you have numbers. It doesn’t make it particularly right but, if you want to close the deal, then the person with the most zero’s behind the number wins, money/ Numbers talks boo! So in a way, I do not understand why it is such a revelation.

I do get that the voice of the oppressed is becoming louder and there are more avenues to voice and challenge , but, Society has always had a call on what was beautiful or what was the standard benchmark of ‘when you’ve made it.’ Actually, let me rephrase that, society has portrayed what they feel is beautiful through magazine covers and told us what they think we should have through adverts and we have been gullible enough to fashion ourselves after it. That sounds better as we are just as much to blame! We have all at some point been sucked into wanting to follow the fashions of the world. I am not saying that I agree with the fact that people feel pressured to achieve the false reality but society is fake and will always try and manipulate what they feel is perfect. Being in the modelling industry, there has been times where even I felt out of place, as bookers and brands have a say over what they feel is perfect for them and you know what, they are 100 percent entitled- I am the one who put myself into the industry.

For example, I have always been insecure with how much bigger and dis-proportioned my boobs are with the rest of my size 6-8 body. Don’t get me wrong I embrace them  and j’adore  them now! But being on the receiving end to people always looking at them as if you put too much tissue down your bra in compared to your ‘marga’ waist was a lot at times. Especially in my early days of modelling. One time I went for a casting for a well known brand early in my career and I left wanted a breast reduction lol. I remember standing in a adjustable swimsuit , all the models had been given the same style but it legit barely covered a nipple lol compared to the other less endowed girls who it fit perfectly. It was safe to say I did not get the job and remember texting my boyfriend at the time ( who obviously was not in agreement of popping the fun bags lol) upset that my body was not the perfect beautiful size of the other models.

I would say that was a low point of my career as it made me not want to go for jobs afraid that my body wasn’t the ‘norm’. Honestly, if it wasn’t for a good support network and self belief, I think I would have stopped modelling altogether- no lies! To some reading this it may not be a big deal, but body confidence is real and even though I personally wouldn’t want to change a thing about my body anymore, societies ‘standard’ can call your confidence into question. I thus turned to building my Instagram as I felt it was one of the only ways I could have jurisdiction over what I was proud of and make my own opportunities.

Even though I am small fish in the social media pond, I am able  to make my own opportunities and focus on portraying my beauty the way I want to, I have had the opportunity to work with brands and meet people I do not feel I would be able to without the use of social media. I feel that I am able to create my own ‘standard’ and be my own beautiful. Yes, there are people that edit the life from their photos but, 9 times out of 10 they admit it – Photoshop is not a secret anymore and if they do retouch their photos, personally I feel it is there prerogative, we are being just as bad casting judgement on something they post and feel is beautiful to them. I say good on them and there enhanced face tuned bootay!!!

Now is not the time to be tearing each other down about what is right or wrong, I do understand that as influences people are impressionable but my question is, if our little sister, cousin, brother, best friend or whoever is impressionable what are we doing to tell them they are beautiful in there own way, what are we doing to influence our own back yard ? If people in my circle such as friends and family  didn’t install particular views and down to this day challenge my mindset, I would not be as strong minded as I am today to love myself as I am despite things that could have knocked me.

I am not going to lie, I feel proud when I see numbers behind my name as I worked dang hard to get there. It is not the whole focus of my life but it is something I am passionate in sharing that hard work pays off and if a 5’3(and a half), big boobed, tiny waist, curly haired chick like me can influence to love every part of you then long may it last.

Real recognises real xx

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R&R Luxury Travel Kit Review

Let me guess, your social media feed is now full of poolside pictures, cidres in the park, people going out more and wearing less ( amen to drake) and the excitement of finally going on that holiday you booked 5 months ago ! Yes summer is here finally and R&R luxury have launched their first travel kit perfect for your skin not only just for summer but for all seasons if you ask me.

About R&R Luxury

Founded by Beauty Entrepreneur Valerie Obaze in 2010, R&R is a luxury beauty brand is founded on the philosophy of transforming one of nature’s purest and richest gifts – Shea – into the most enriching beauty products. This ingredients of this pure and natural brand is beneficial for the whole family men, women and children.

What’s inside the travel kit ?

Within this simplisticcanvas bag are all you really need for your skin when travelling

• Shea oil (Serenity)
• Liquid black soap cleanser
• Shea lip butter

How long does it last ?

I received this travel kit a month ago and still have product left over which I feel could probably last me another month or so. This is based on me using the Shea oil and liquid black soap twice a day and the lip butter as a base before lip gloss application which honestly only God knows how often I do that lol. But overall I would definitely say it is amazing value for money !

How do I use each product?

• Shea oil– R&R Luxury recommend using this multipurpose oil after a bath or shower, mixing with Everyday cream whilst skin is still wet to help with scarring, dry skin, soothe skin burn and also sensitive skin. Personally I used a small amount (1 pump) on my face after cleansing with the liquid black soap. The results where instant and found a difference to the hydration in my skin within days
• Liquid Black soap- This too can be used for both face and body which is what I love about natural skincare products. I can safely say my face ( which is usually very sensitive) responded extremely well to this product and did notice a natural glow.
• Shea Lip Butter- As recommended by R&R themselves, apply as often as you want for kissable lips !

How much is it ?

£12.00 which when compared to the products you receive, how long they last for and other travel kits on the market- it is great value for money!

Where can I buy this product?

Online at https://www.randrluxury.co.uk

Do I need this ?

Yes you do ! If you are prone to having dry/sensitive skin, prone to flaring up at the wrong time and instead want confidence in knowing that your skin will be looking flawless all summer long then the R&R travel kit/ range is for you!

Happy travels !xx

Skincare Review: Skin Kissed Facial Serum

Lets face it, any one of us who believes they can cake over their imperfection in the heat of summer with the best foundations, concealers and the works have obviously not been in the heat all I am saying is sweat! It is time to let those pores breathe a little and the only way we can is making sure our skin is perfect from now is by using skin kind products such as Skin Kissed Vitamin C Serum.

I was sent this product two weeks ago and already can see and feel a difference as, my face is smoother, less prone to drying out and dewy.

What’s in it?

Aqua ( water), rosa damascene (rose water) vitamin c (ascorbic acid) glycerine hyaluronic acid, Phenoxyethanol, marine collagen (fish) those are the ingredients.

Is this Vitamin Skincare Product Cruelty-free?

Yes! According to this animal loving brand this product has “never come close to an animal”.

Possibly acne/allergy/troubling for some ingredients?

Although it’s obviously possible to be allergic to anything, I personally did not experience any side effects from using this product.

How do you use it?

Skin Kissed suggests using this product twice daily for maximum results even though results vary according to skin type. I personally would apply the serum in the morning just before applying my makeup. I found this super effective as it made my makeup glow and also helped my skin stay hydrated throughout the day. Additionally I would then use this serum after cleansing my face as part of my night time routine.

How much is it? /Size/Approximate cost per usage?
£29.95 for 20ml. How long it lasts depends entirely on how dehydrated you are and how regularly you use it. If you’re using it twice a day, you should be good for about a month. This serum is high-end in its price range however Skin Kissed do not use any cheap chemicals or useless oils and their formula is natural with high percentages of active ingredients, which does justify the amount spent for fast results.

How’s the distribution? Available freely or limited?
At present this product can be found online at https://skinkissed.co/ but does ship worldwide.

What’s good about it?
Does what it says on the packet which is enhancing the quality of your skin. This truly water-based formula can be used as a moisturiser for acneic or combo skins or a serum under a slightly heavier cream for really dry or dehydrated skins. I see evidence of making skin ‘illuminating’ which is a major summer plus!

What’s not so good about it?
In compared to other serums I have used in the past it is not cheap.  Although  it can be used on it’s own, I personally would only recommend using this on its own if your skin is very oily .

Do you need it?
If you are looking to add a serum into your daily skin routine (which you totally should be), I would recommend as the results are obvious and even though not as affordable as other serums in the market, it will be a treat for your skin!

 

 

Thought Bubble: Life changes you

Life experiences change you.  Not that it is meant to be some sort of mind blowing revelation but, I was looking through some old pictures that I saved on some random memory stick which was full of cute cuddly family moments and genuine smiles with ex-besties, boyfriends and the works- which are now deleted for extra storage lol. I couldn’t resist flicking through those pictures and thinking my goodness how much things have changed, how much I have changed.

I even find myself telling people at times that I was a really good person, not that I’m not anymore ha, but I mean I was a REALLY good person sweet as pie. Don’t get me wrong she is still there somewhere, but she buried and locked away inside a hard shell so that I don’t feel vulnerable to peoples tricks. I feel like I have become somewhat Icy and savage as we now call it in compared to that sweet, ignorant girl of 18 years old in those pictures. Life has changed me.

There are times where I wish I could forget about memories or situations which made me less trusting and more cautious, after all, she’s still there inside me and does come out from time to time but it is just the simple truth that life and the experiences that come with it, especially in this world, sucks out any innocence you possibly may have wanted to hold on to and forces you to question everything or only let few people get close to you.

By no means am I complaining, but I can say that even though like many other of you readers, some experiences are bloody tough to swallow is does make you wiser and stronger.

Lets stay true to us even if its different to what we originally thought our lives would look like.

Shalishah xx

Thought Bubble: I expect too much from Men…

There is probably some experienced women out there who may stumble across the title of this blog and say ” Well honey, I could of told you that for free” but, no matter how much history replays itself, we always seem to get ourselves into the same pickle – so much for evolution ey!

My issue is this, I get myself into a great and solo stage where I am at my peak, I am happy, not reporting to any one, no significant over and I have reached the stage of contentment in self love and all that. Then bang, here comes someone who you think understands you, gets where your coming from and suddenly I am feeling like I need them to be there for me. Like WTH… I was just fine ten seconds before you came and all of a sudden when they have typically lost interest in whatever the hell they must have found vaguely interesting, has disappeared like Cinderella’s ball gown after 12 ‘o’ clock.

This is not to be confused for one of those ” All men are trash” rants ( I am saving that for next week ha) but, this is a confession that as soon as I find what I believe might be a good guy I find myself giving life and caring but maybe the trick is to not expect the same thing back, not expect him to be my prince Eric from little mermaid (Sorry for the Disney references lol), but realise that things cool off and what might be right for now may not be right forever and not to expect they will always understand the sacrifice and loyalty you are trying to show.

Miscommunication is a bugger and although I long for a guy who can be consistent, all these experiences make it much more harder for the next guy as I become more closed off (sucks I know). But, as they say, what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger and as long as you know what you expect from yourself and focus on when you are most happiest, I guess we will find the prince charming that would like to fit around us and meet us in the middle for a change.

In the words of my Guyanese Grandma “Every Mouldy biscuit gat he  vum vum cheese” or in other words, there is someone for everyone xx

Nails on Fleek 💅🏾 @NailsBySudan

Believe it or not but warmer weather is round the corner. This means, wedding invites, open toes sandals, spontaneous visits to your favourite roof top bar and generally wanting to look like a million dollars. I am here to save you from holding that Martini glass with chipped nails or having to paint yet another layer of nail varnish on top of those ill-painted toes when the sun suddenly shows it face- trust me we have all been there.All welcome and show some love to Sudan’s Nail Artistry!

Located in the heart of Tooting this new salon is the perfect place to feel and look like a pampered Princess/ Prince. Lavishly decorated, staff are on hand to ensure you receive the best service. Whether you opt for a simple manicure or like myself fancy letting your nails doing the talking through creative and unique designs, Sudan caters for all of this.

My personal favourite is the pedicure bar as you are able to give your feet some much needed TLC and soak your troubles away with some real pampering. So, make sure you head on down to Sudan’s Nails Artistry and make sure you are ready whatever the weather!

Address: 4 Selkirk Rd, London SW17 0ES

Price List & Deals: https://www.treatwell.co.uk/place/sudan-nail-artistry/ 

Thought Bubble: When The Going Gets Tough…

All I’m saying is, if the last couple of months of my life were televised it would probably be on par with Eastenders and popular on netflix- DRAMA! My phone was stolen, I was in a car accident and now have no car, I am in the process of moving out for the first time and am kind of excited but apprehensive and unlike my last blog- I have actually been giving the whole dating thang a go but feel like I must still not be doing something right or maybe I am – lord knows!

Don’t get me wrong I know there are much more serious things going on in the world and when put in perspective I will get over this very long blip but, it’s like can something just go right for once! I do a good job of covering things over and acting like I am okay with life just not going to plan (she says after finishing her 3rd box of Kleenex ha) but life is tough!

So, what do we do? Honestly, each situation is different and what one person might find an absolute mountain another person could view it as a piece of cake but, it is okay to feel like you can’t handle it. No matter how Superhuman or Goddess-like we may look, we are only human and life is bound to get on top of us. Take a step back and re-evaluate your options to work around the situation or if its something that can’t be overlooked build your inner self to work through it. You got this!

I have also made it a task to set new goals to help me re-focus on something more positive rather than things that may not be going particularly great. A perfect way to build a more positive mind. Start small and realistic and build on them believing that even if it does get sticky like honey it will taste sweet in the end!

Chins up Puddings xx

Shalishah Loves❤: Tonight Josephine

I have officially branded Tonight Josephine’s the cutest cocktail bar in town and here’s why:

Yaass Josephine:

• It Looks Amazing: If your a lover of all things fabulous, then this has your name all over it! Josephine’s is stylishly kitted out with neon slogans, mirrored ceilings and snazzy interior. All I can say, is if Marilyn Monroe and Audrey Hepburn were still alive, they would approve.

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• Josephine’s Cocktails slay: For starters, Prosseco is 2 for 1- I know, how perfect! Happy hour runs from 5-7 every single day of the week on all cocktails and boy! do the bar tenders know how to mix and good one. My personal favourite of the night had to be the ‘Flaming zombie’ which consists of Bacardi rum, triple sec, passion fruit, pineapple and topped with of course- fire.

• Atmosphere: Josephine definitely caters for every type of women with a variety of well known songs setting the mood in the background, it is every bit of a women’s paradise. However, the crowd is very mixed with men and women. Where the guys present must have secretly love the quirky girl power nature of the bar or they’re smart and know where to find the ladies! Either way all enjoy the vibrant night that ‘Tonight Josephine’ offers.

The Debbie Downer 💔

This is by no means something that can be helped by a Bar tucked away in a basement however there isn’t a lot of space! Tables are available to book either online or by calling the venue (which I suggest you do well in advance) but there are not a lot of tables and if you haven’t been lucky enough to sit like loyalty, then you are left walking around trying to perch on the any space you can find. This does not take away from the class of the venue as it does make it intimate and brings a sense of ‘girls night in’ (with a bunch of additional strangers) that is very manageable! I do hope in the future ‘Tonight Josephine’ is able to expand like it’s famous Brother ‘Adventure bar’ and is able to have bigger venue. That would be an icing to an already brilliant cake!

Website: http://www.tonightjosephine.co.uk/ 

 

Sunday Fun-day: No Mirror Makeup Challenge !

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Review: Champneys Forrest Mere

After a month of stress, I thought a quite, solo, spa retreat was exactly what a girl needed to clear her head and after work colleagues and family friends raved about Champneys, I decided to give it a try in my hour of need!

Location:I will not lie to you reader and say that as I was driving through the Liphook forest, I was 100% convinced that my Google Maps knew where it was going. However, as I hesitantly followed its direction I saw a reassuring sign saying “relaxation this way”. From that moment on wards it was as if I had been teleported into another world- (Put down those harribo’s shalishah your not in Kansas anymore, kind of moment).

 

Champneys Forest Mere is situated on a hill overlooking the lake and surrounded by an abundance of cheerful greenery.

Overall: The Champneys is well situated with beautiful scenery and is well sign posted.

 

 

Arrival: Champneys staff was very accommodating allowing me to check in early as my massage was booked for 9:00am ( note to readers do not book last minute otherwise you be left with the ungodly hour time slots, like me). However, with the cost on £24 extra (which also included lunch) I was able to leave my bags behind the desk and use the facilities, my room however would still not be ready until 14:30. I was given a complimentary robe and flip flops(to keep) and a tour around Champneys.

Overall: Staff were very accommodating,  they made me feel welcome and answered any questions I had. I do wish I could have checked in earlier then 14:30 which I understand was available on a VIP package (I haven’t made it there yet) but, with all the facilities on offer time goes very quickly.

The Massage: Being a person willing to try new unfamiliar things, I decided to be adventurous and try something other then your usual deep tissue massage and opt for a Reiki Massage. This promised me a soothed mind, calmed emotions and recharged batteries which, in my head said tick,tick,tick. My masseuse was called Fiona- she was lovely!Fiona was able to explain to me areas of my body which had the most tension such as my lower back and recommended other activities I could do in the spa

Massage room

to carry on feeling relaxed.

 

Overall: My massage lasted for 50 wonderful minutes and was very relaxing, I left feeling very calm and less stressed. I do recommend this alternative massage as I am still feeling the benefits a few days after. Staff are very friendly and the massage room was clean however, I would have preferred a room with more colour or with mood lights, even though I do understand that the lights are off for the best part of it, so the brown bed sheets can perhaps be overlooked.

Facilities: Now for the good part- The facilities! All I can say is that I was not disappointed. After my massage which left me in a state of zen, I glided down the stars and through the doors of the Female Spa Changing rooms. Lockers were spacious and easy to work, and from a brief scan hairdryers, toilets and changing space was all up to scratch. With Grazia and ELLE ( magazines) in hand I headed out into the main Spa area.

Relaxation area(water beds)

Indoor Pool

The spa itself was not busy bearing in mind I attended on a Sunday, however you could easily tell that there would be enough room to still enjoy the experience. I started off in the Whirlpool to which I foolishly thought was a Hot tub until I saw the sign ‘This is not a Hot Tub’. Then ventured into the sauna, cold room (which allows you to cool down with snow), poolside thermal suite, the actual hot tub, steam room then cooled down with a refreshing rain forest shower. I am personally not much of a swimmer so did not go in to either the outside or inside pool but from observation was a good size and very clean. Instead I chose to retire on a waterbed for the remainder of my time building up to lunch.

Overall: Probably to date one of the best spas I have been to! The forest decor elements  really created a retreat vibe and made you feel at home . There was enough space to sit down and as a solo spa goer I did not feel intimidated to go around and try, however, my highlight would have to be the water beds situated behind a glass sound proof door, laying on a fur blanket and putting the world to right whilst looking at this seasons must haves and listening to the grateful album of DJ Khaled- perfect!

Food: I was intrigued to see what Champneys would serve me as when booking I was promised a nutritious and tasty meal- Boy were they right! For lunch, there was so much variety and had the choice of salads, vegetables, and a beef roast (after all it was Sunday) all served as a buffet. Champneys generously map out your plate with a section for all the nutritious goodies they were serving, however, I had already piled my plate up with juicy, mouthwatering beef and potato and a small but reasonable spoon of cranberry and beetroot couscous, I only saw this healthy guide after I finished my meal (oops).  For desert, I had a mango pudding and a helping of mixed fruits.

Dinner was amazing, the ambience had changed from everyone eating in their Champneys robes and flip-flops to a much more formal but friendly atmosphere to suit the a la carte  menu. Service was fast and the meals where once again very delicious.

Overall: My dining experience was fabulous! The food was delicious and catered for everyone with their extensive menu. My Lemon meringue dessert with coconut was definitely a highlight. Restaurant staff was very friendly, service was at a reasonable pace and I was not made to feel uncomfortable as a solo diner.  You do need to book dinner in advance which can be done at the reception.

 

The Room: Now for the main event, my overnight headquarters. After long awaiting the words “Your room is ready,” I was finally let into my room. I was in a standard room with a Garden view. On a beautiful day as it was, this was very well suited. The room itself was clean and laid out beautiful. It came equip with hairdyer, mirror, USB plugs, seating area and TV (great as love Island was airing at 9pm #priorities)  Bathroom was brilliant, complimentary champneys showergel etc, lovely overhead shower (spacious) and the usual towels etc.

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Overall: This room was perfect for what I needed, there were extra robes, flip flops. towels and was an extremely comfortable stay.

 

Final judgement

If you haven’t already guessed, I thoroughly enjoyed my stay at Champneys Forest Mere. Although I did not get a chance to take advantage off all this resort had to offer such as the fitness classes, gym, cycling and boat hire, Champneys gave me exactly what I came for which was to leave feeling relaxed and rejuvenated. Not only was the food a massive hit and definitely worth it, the spa experience was by far one of my favourites and can’t wait to plan my next trip.